Truely Epic People

Truely epic people are hard to come by; yes, you can come across awesome people, but this is different... These people say things that you'd never even thought of. These people have tiny perks that make them weird. These people might not be your friends, but you remember them for life. Now I've been down and out lately, and still am I guess, but I thought of a conversation I had with one of these TEP, and I instantly smiled. So I copy and pasted it, and here it is:

THIS CONVERSATION TOOK PLACE ON FEBRUARY 16th, 2009 :~
KEY:
{---} :random faces
{-x-} :stuff about insects
{x-x} :stuff about being tired
{xxx} : stuff about Jewish Holiday Cows

{-x-}
[16:05] EllyPhant: haha still into Ray hhmm?
[16:05] StripeS: DUH! If you watched Dancing on Ice, you'd be as well! lol
[16:05] StripeS: He's just soooo talented...
[16:05] EllyPhant: U still wanna pry off his chest hair with your teeth? U are such a groupie hehe
[16:06] EllyPhant: Wrong! His hairdresser is talented.
[16:06] StripeS: lol He's 5 years older than me :)
[16:06] EllyPhant: aahh well. Don’t let you being too old stop you trying ya luck ;)
[16:06] StripeS: he is a great actor, singer, dancer and ice skater :P
[16:07] EllyPhant: Yes... it's a shame he has no legs or arms...
[16:07] StripeS: They did 80's week on Dancing on Ice and they were like, HE was still wearing Nappies in the 80s... He was only born in 1988 :P awww
[16:07] StripeS: He's totally strong! he did the drake lift!
[16:07] EllyPhant: I was born in 1988
[16:07] EllyPhant: And I’m STILL in nappies :$
[16:08] StripeS: lmao! (lol)
[16:09] EllyPhant: I would like to rest my face in between his freshly waxed behind and fall to sleep
[16:09] StripeS: Shup you perv! First u diss Stephen Fry... now ur perving on my Ray Quinn! Get your own person! lol
[16:10] EllyPhant: hahahahaha
[16:10] EllyPhant: I know. My pervifying of your mind is almost complete... already... your sick twisted mind is forming as you become less and less disgusted by the taste of marmite on toast... SOOON you won't even flush anymore.
[16:11] EllyPhant: or wear a seat belt.
[16:11] StripeS: lmao Ych a Fi! :P Im pretty twisted and perverted anyway. I read Chuck Palahniuk, remember? lol
[16:12] EllyPhant: Is he the man who was imprisoned for paedophilia and writes novels out of his sperm and blood for ink, and uses his bed linen for paper in his sell?
[16:12] EllyPhant: He’s a saint really...
[16:12] EllyPhant: cell*
[16:13] StripeS: Erm... I dont think so... He wrote Fight Club and Lullaby though... :P
[16:14] EllyPhant: ohh that must of been ray then...
[16:14] EllyPhant: :P
[16:15] StripeS: SHUP FOO! lol
{-x-}
{x-x}
[16:22] EllyPhant: elly wants to... ring up ray and let him take me to bed... :P haha
[16:22] StripeS: lmao... Well he's have to catch a bus from my bed in that case! lol
[16:23] EllyPhant: Then he’ll be able to RAY-pe me.
[16:23] StripeS: lmao! HIGH FIVE!
[16:23] EllyPhant: lol!
[16:23] EllyPhant: *high fives*
[16:24] EllyPhant: Personally I think wouldn’t mind a little bit of man-company
[16:24] EllyPhant: He looks like one of those.... PEOPLE.
{---}
[16:25] EllyPhant: He can’t resist that pinewood odour of two men and their man smell in the morning
[16:25] EllyPhant: EW.
{x-x}
[16:25] StripeS: lol Elly! Im a minor! Polluting my already polluted mind! :P
{x-x}
[16:26] EllyPhant: How old are you again? 12-teen right? :P
[16:26] StripeS: lmao 5teen :P
[16:26] EllyPhant: hahaha
[16:27] EllyPhant: Well I’m 20. and so is ray. STAY WITHIN UR OWN AGE BRACKET WOMAN! *slaps*
[16:27] StripeS: lmao NEVER! Im 6teen in November so :P
[16:28] EllyPhant: He likes SOCKS and CRACKS! not MANNINA AND FLAPS!
[16:28] StripeS: Im might as well face it I'm addicted to Ray :P lol
[16:28] StripeS: lmao! SHUP FOO!!! He has a gf anywho... Can we kill her then share him? lol
[16:28] EllyPhant: My witty creativeness is slowly being replaced with just working class vulgarity.... soon I’ll feel the urge to drink lager and pop to the bookies.
[16:29] EllyPhant: Only if we can eat her.
[16:29] EllyPhant: So we... CONSUME the attraction he feels for her. Then he'll be attracted to us. Makes sense :P
[16:29] StripeS: Fine... you can, Im a veggie... I'll chew on the bones cz that's not meat :)
[16:30] EllyPhant: ummm well what about the bone MARROW that’s meat.
[16:30] EllyPhant: ok ok
[16:30] StripeS: I'll spit it out :P
[16:30] EllyPhant: We’ll make her work out first. To keep the meat lean and her organs supple.
[16:30] EllyPhant: :P
[16:30] EllyPhant: I would eat a human
[16:30] EllyPhant: If they were properlly cooked and consented
[16:30] EllyPhant: I'd eat them
[16:31] EllyPhant: NOM NOM NOM NOM
[16:31] StripeS: I'd rather eat a human than an animal cz animals have no voice :P
[16:31] EllyPhant: Yes but they still scream
{xxx}
[16:34] EllyPhant: Its also in Jewish law for the Rabbi to suck a newborn boys penis during circumsicion
[16:35] EllyPhant: To suck the blood out of the wound created after the foreskin is about or has been removed.
[16:35] StripeS: you're joking
[16:35] StripeS: no...
[16:35] EllyPhant: Nope. An orthodox rabbi in new york was convicted for giving several Jewish boys hepatitis
[16:35] StripeS: :S
[16:36] EllyPhant: Don’t believe me? I’ll find you the hebrew term for it
[16:36] StripeS: G2g... my Dad's almost home :P bye! Email me the term!
[16:36] EllyPhant: In more liberal Jewish synagogues they use a tube so the rabbi’s lips do not touch the boys penis
[16:36] EllyPhant: ok byes
[16:36] EllyPhant: xx
[16:36] StripeS: tra xx

I THEN GOT THIS EMAIL:~
"mezizah -- Hebrew term for the third step in the Jewish circumcision ritual, in which the mohel applies his mouth to the freshly circumcised infant's penis and sucks up the first drops of blood. In more recent times this procedure has been carried out via a tube, as infections, venereal disease, and tuberculosis, sometimes resulting in the death of the infant, have occurred due to contamination of the wound. "
"Shabbath 19:2 They may perform on the Sabbath all things that are needful for circumcision: excision, tearing, sucking [the wound], and putting thereon a bandage and cumin. If this had not been pounded up on the eve of the Sabbath a man may chew it with his teeth and then apply it."
Various more sources on other stuff, and wikipedia.
Told you. hehehe

What I Recieved...

Today is my Birthday! (Y)

• 10.2 megapixel digital camera (whom I called Toby)
• A bright lime carrier and a card-reader to go with Toby.
• DVDs: The History Boys, My So-Called Life, Click, Being Human.
• CDs: Burn Halo, Motley Crue
• A white and green watch from Next.
• A tee saying 'I Jingle All The Way'
• An angel decoration and 'Voodoo The Destroyer'.
• A magnet of Aiden Turner from Desperate Romantics.
• A keyring of Santi.
• Biffy Clyro's new album 'Only Revolutions' (from Tess)
• An epic notebook and a cute little brown cat ornament (from Kieran)
• An epic black duck broach that I adore (from Hannah)
• Another cute little cat ornament, but yellow instead (from Sam)
• A tee and 'Next: Just Pink' fragrant bath set (from the Brown Family)
• A strawberry keyring and an epic frame (from the Smith Family)
• A red (not blue) box of Lindt chocolates (from the Hammett Family)
• A keyring that shall be converted into a necklace (from Cerian)

To celebrate my coming of age, I shall be going to see Elliot Minor on Thursday November 19th, and New Moon on Saturday November 21st. I know people are thinking, She Didn't Throw A Party? I don't like them when I'm the focus though!

Tofu! <3

Routine Ruins

In the dead of night, when nobody is awake, my soul starts to dread the tiny slithers of light that are bound to shed through the clouds at any given moment. The light marks the beginning of a new day, and with each one passing, one can't help but feel the cruel, harsh reality that we live in a routine lifestyle sink in. Our lives are dictated to us by the passing of the sun. The hours between the darkness descending and the light shining through are just as lively as a corpse. Everyone's gone, the next day is creeping closer to you. Deadlines that haven't been met, people you don't want to see, it all comes to mind with a sudden cold reality that is as welcome as a knife in the eye. We all become broken products of routine; routine ruins.

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

Nine Steps...

Set the character's NORMALITY. An EVENT happens to change it. The main character now has an OBJECTIVE. On their way to complete this, around three OSTRUCTIONS happen that prevent the character from achieving their objective. A CRISIS happens that makes us think, "No, now they'll never get to where they're going..." This is followed by a CLIMAX, and then comes down to a CONCLUSION. Whether or not they achieve their objective is up to you as the writer.

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

Eargasms for the Poor!

I only have one Biffy Clyro album (Puzzle), and it's amazing. Simon Neil is stupendous though; everything he says has an underlying truth, he's an amazing singer (Scottish, yet you can't tell as much anymore) and he's one of those people that can't help but to come out with amazing ideas and music. I get Kerrang! and NME every single Wednesday, and this week they were giving away a free offer: Biffy Clyro recorded four songs in an acoustic session, and with the given code, you could get them for free. There's a tiny little catch: you have a limited amount of time. The first 2,000 people get all four songs, the next 1,000 people get two songs, the following 2,500 people got one song. I didn't realise that, so when I found out, my heart sank and I did it quickly. I GOT FOUR SONGS! Their songs sound amazing (you can hear their whole album on MySpace) and I don't just want it, I need it. It sounds so good, and it's a lot more uplifting than their last one. The topic is love, and love it I shall. It's called Only Revolutions and it's released on November 9th. Get it now if you know what's good for your ears!

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

Just A Monolgue

Okay, so I was in Drama the other day and we were all told to write a monologue from someone during the Miner's Strike in around 5 minutes. I chose to do one from the old lady, because I like to write as old people, but at the same time it's hard to know what old people would've thought about the Miner's Strike since it was 25 years ago and they'd all be dead now. Anywho, I took inspiration from Sara Goldfarb in Hubert Selby Jr's 'Requiem For A Dream' and from a few old ladies that I've seen and spoken to. I nearly cried writing it since I put myself in the same mindset as the character. Sorry the introduction to it is longer than the actual thing itself! Here it is:

"Oh John, if only you could see how bright the silver candlesticks are shining. I cleaned them just for you. I only wish that David would think more of you. He's involved in that strike... I'm telling you John, if people had seen what you and I went through with the war they'd stop this silly nonsense. Oh, the kettle just went off. I'm making tea; milk and one suger, just as you'd like it. I remember, you use to say, "Oh Barbara, you're sweet enough!" John, I miss you. I got a cat to warm your side of the bed, but it's not the same. It eats more than you ever did and I'm allergic to it."

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

Stupid Birds and Bees

Today, I narrowly avoided the Birds and Bees conversation, and to be completely truthful, it left me with horrible chills. This is what happened:

DAD - When are you going to have sex?

ME - When I'm Sixteen...

MOM - You're goig to have sex just because you're Sixteen?!

ME - No, I mean when I do it'll be legal...

DAD - I'm not talking about the law. i'm asking you when you're going to have sex.

ME - I'm not going to plan it out. It's not like you have to have an appointment!

Then dad went on about how he doesn't like me talking to a seventeen-year-old who isn't in school and who is going to be moving into a flat soon. He went on to tell me that he didn't want me to ever have sex (obviously joking...), but still, it was horrible.

Dad doesn't like my latest fascination because he lives in a hostel (for resonable reasons - he wasn't thrown out for being a delinquent), he didn't go back to school (instead he took up some courses which he passed and is on £200 a week working full time from 4.30am) and he happens to be someone that Tess knows (even though she pretty much knows the whole of Ammanford). Dad said that all a guy needs is a place to take a girl back, but he just seems like such a monster when he goes on about 'what all guys do'. It's so annoying and judgmental of him to not like someone when he hasn't ever met him... He makes me happy, Mother seems happy for me at least!

I feel so frustraited. I mean, in nineteen days I'll be able to have sex with whoever I choose (as long as they're over sixteen). So it wouldn't be a sin or anything, would it?

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

23 Days To Go...

Okay, so there are twenty-three days until I can sell scrap metal (thanks Sam), so I'm actually really excited! I think that it's probably because I'll be a major (not that I'm going to use that fact for anything knowing me...) and then if anything were to happen, it would be completely legal! Although saying that, with parents like mine, I can't really see when I'll actually get the oppertunity until I'm in university. Maybe they'll change, Dad said my bedtime will go up by half an hour to midnight! We all know that that's going to be another rule forgotten though... I mean, come on, who bothers with a bedtime anymore? Just shut up and they'll let you stay downstairs until three in the morning! However, I get the feeling that I won't actually be getting the 'Birds and Bees' conversation for some reason, it just doesn't seem appropriate after everything we've gone through with Tess!

More importantly though, Abi's birthday is in three days, but we're celebrating on Tuesday instead of the actual Thursday. I'll be sure to tell you how that all goes. Plus I'm going to Swansea as a cat tomorrow, so that should be fun. Hopefully I'll get some pictures and hopefully John and Edward won't go out on the X Factor tonight! They probably will, but I just don't want to see them go! It'll totally suck! Sorry sanity, I've let you down again! Oh, and talking about a lack of sanity, I'm like, on my last 60 pages of American Psycho! I thoroughly enjoyed it, but I can't wait to watch the film with Christian Bale and Jared Leto in!

Kindest Regards,

Tofu xy

Are You Purrrrfect?

Okay... as you all know from a few posts back, I love cats. So, what I've decided to do is get some people to colour in their noses and draw on some whiskers and send me a (or a few) pictures. What I'd like the world to do is take a picture of this and then email it to me at: jupiterstar@hotmail.co.uk, or stick them on photobucket and send me a link. Then, I stick them in a photo album on facebook (entitled The Lovecats). I've linked the album in this post! So yeah, if you want to be amazing and help me with my world mission, then please, take part!

Kindest Regards,

Stripes xy

Hate That I Love You

Just shut up for a minute and listen; I never meant to hurt you, it hurts me just to think of it, and I never meant to hurt you a second time. I guess that's just the way of life though, and don't worry, because I'm suffering now. The thought of you with somebody else hurts as much as if someone was punching me repeatedly in the stomach. However, the thought of me never being 'your girl' again is just the hardest thing to deal with. You've never meant so much to me, and yet I've probably never meant so little to you. I would stab her to death so you would never be with her, the thought of you and her repulses me. I would eat meat just so you would love me. I would cry all my tears and bleed all my blood just to have you back. I know I've always been the one in the wrong, and I never tried hard enough to make things work, but I think that you're the proof I've needed to believe that love can happen more than once. Rob broke my heart the first time, I've broken my heart a second... You're going to stay in my mind until I become a cold, shell of a person. I dreamt that you and I were laying together one night, and I was crying because I love you so much. Alas, when I woke up, I was crying because I knew that that will never be. You will never take me back and I will never expect you to, because you are the best person I will ever know and you deserve so much better than this poor, pathetic thing that people call Sophie Brown. However, that won't stop me from loving you and thinking of you everyday, forever and always.

That's the Spirit (Revenge)

The fog slowly drifted into the window of Laura's apartment as she sat on the floor crying. Slowly sliding the blade down her wrist, there was no commitment in her actions.

"Harder," a voice hissed as the fog descended all around her, "Nobody will notice your petty attempts."

Laura sniffed and a tear slowly ran down her cheek. She shivered with the thought of what was happening, she didn't understand. Did this usually happen? She went to put the razor down and think everything over, but the fog just started to taunt her.

"Too much of a commitment? That's alright, you never do carry out your threats, do you? You don't really mean anything you say, to everyone else, you're just a slow, ugly, pathetic liar. That's fine by me, it's your life after all. All I know is that I'd rather be tortured and killed than be you..."

That did it for sure. Laura burst into tears, picked the razor blade back up and rested the point against her wrist.

"Is this what you want?!" she screamed rhetorically into the fog.

"Of course," it replied smugly, knowing that he was going to get what he wanted.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she put all of her energy into her hand and pressed the razor as hard as she could've ever imagined. It wasn't long until she was panting on the floor, her eyes slowly glazing over, her carpet a brand new colour. A low, malevolent laugh filled the room as the fog slowly left through the window where it had once entered. All that was left was the body of a dead teenager.

xy

It's Crap Anyway.

Just for once, I wanted to wake up in a good mood and then paint something great for art. What happened? I woke up with an incredibly painful wrist and then once it was better, I had a huge argument with the acrylic paint. Why? Because I needed blue, white and navy to paint a china cup. When I put the tiniest dot of black in with the blue, it turned green. GREEN! What the hell? All I wanted to do was paint a tea cup and then present it to my teacher to say, "Look Miss, I really do try and I really do care. I actually did this on my own." Of course I can't though, because I am so crap at art, I don't even know the first thing about the different kind of paints. I am officially one of the crapest people in my art class and t be completely and totally honest, I've stopped caring because it's my own fault for taking such a stupid subject and it's a pointless GCSE anyway.

Kindest Regards,
A Disappointed,

Stripes xy

Snowy Balls

I'm eating Marks and Spencer's Snowy Balls! They're milk chocolate balls (71%) in a crisp candy shell, rolled in icing sugar. To make it better, it's Made in the UK with Belgian Chocolate. The best chocolate is all Belgian of course... Kasabian just came on Tv, yay!

Anyway, lately I've been seeing multiple people with the intent of fixing my body up. I have benign hyper mobility and it causes a lot of pain sometimes, I also have co-ordination and balance problems, just because I'm special! I was loning in school today as all the Welshies were on a trip to North Wales (and all of my friends, as you've probably guessed, are Welshies). So I left school at dinner time in order to see a physio lady. We had a long talk about multiple things, what the main concerns are, medical history, that kind of thing...

OH LORD! Cobra Starship's new song was just on Kerrang! They're finally getting somewhere over here! Yay! I MAKE THE GOOD GIRLS GO BAD!!! I MAKE THE... sorry.

long story short, she advised I take up yoga, so we bought a yoga set and Mother just bought a yoga dvd from Amazon.com! I'm going to be physically active everyone! How dandy is that?! Oh yeah, and I got full marks again in English, so I had a talk with him as he insulted me by hinting at plagiarism. he told me it was so good, as opposed to I'm too bad to get full marks... Woop.

Kindest Regards,

An Enthusiastic,

Stripes xy

The Dream Stealer

There's something about school that is breaking my bruised heart; I don't expect you to know what it is, because it is a recent (or at least has only been noticed as of late) thing. Here, let me explain:

I have a book, a very expensive notebook to be exact, and I love it with all my mind. Everything from the powder pink background to the bright green bird as the main feature. It appeals to all my senses... I was too scared to use it because I was scared that I would simply waste it. However, after using my Dream Dictionary for months, dreams have become very important to me, so I decided that using it as a Dream Book, where I jot all of my dreams down, wouldn't be considered as a waste by myself in a few months time.

This is the background of my tragic tale...

Ever since school started back, dreams have been escaping my memory box as soon as my mind awakens. This is very upsetting because not only do I now have next to no idea what is playing on my sub-conscious, but I also have nothing to write down in my favourite, very expensive notebook. I'll have a huge gap in it and that, quite simply, will not do!

Mother says that this is a good thing as it shows that there is nothing stressful or important enough playing on my mind for me to actually remember the oh so important dreams, however, I disagree and think that the lack of memory as far as dreams are concerned is being caused by school itself! Alas, in my opinion, School has stolen my Dreams, and that's a crime...

Actually, using the word crime has just reminded me of something that I read the other day... In Poem for the Day One, there's a bullet point in the top left corner of October 29 (Pg.317) and it says the following:

Sir Walter Raleigh executed October 29th 1618. Facing death he is reported to have said of the axe, "This is sharp medicine, but it is a sure cure for all diseases"

I just thought that was pretty epic and I had to share it with you!

Kindest Regards,

A Dreamless,

Stripes xy

Nostalgic Wounds Reopened

Yesterday morning, I woke up happier than usual. I was so happy that I actually smiled and thought about all the things that I could do today that would help me to continue in this joyous mood. But first, I had to wake up Holly and let her know I was awake and that I'd give her some treats in a second. So I stretched my hand down, and stroked her head and then realised that it felt smaller than it should be. And that's when the cold, harsh reality struck...

Shooting up in bed, I looked at Mary, who was sleeping against my legs, and I let out a sad, silent, sob. That's exactly where Holly use to sleep every night until Mother and Dad took her in her room because of all the sorrow that hit us when we all realised that it could be her last night any night. Then she had to sleep downstairs because the chemotherapy proved too much and she couldn't hold her meals.

Instead of seeing the half black Labrador, half Whippet, on my baby rug taking up a massive amount of my leg space, I saw the pedigree whippet on my duvet talking up a tiny amount of it. (I use to put my baby rug on my bed so she's sleep there instead of on Tess' bed, but after she passed, I hung it on my chair and refuse to put it on my bed for the painful memories that it would provoke.)

Now don't get me wrong, I love Mary to bits, but if somebody offered me the chance to have Holly back, alive and healthy, I'd jump at it. Needles to say, the good mood didn't stay.

Kindest Regards,

A Mournful,

Stripes xy

Today (and the Other Days...)

A lot has happened this week, and I can't be bothered to even summarise it all to my very own mother! All you need to know is that I now have a boyfriend (Dave), I lost three friends and I had a really good AS result for Critical Thinking. I'm getting my GCSE result today, but to be honest, I can't really find the energy to be scared or nervous about it, as long as I can pretend to be pleased in front of the people that'll be watching, I'll be happy! If you learn to pretend emotions, then you'll be able to find your way out of tricky situations! I'll be going to the cinema after with my amazing friend, Abi, to see The Time Traveller's Wife. I feel happy because I went to England overnight on Monday and England feels like home to me. I just love it there! We went there as an early present for Mother since Dad can't get her birthday off...

It's Mother's birthday today, I got her Define perfume, Badedas bubble bath, The Liar by Stephen Fry, a poetry book, blue eye shadow, Lost in Austen dvd, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and Arctic Monkey's Humbug. I think she's happy over all, and that's all I could've asked for. She got loads off Dad as well... I'm trying to convince Dave to draw a picture inside her card. I bought Giant Parma Violets the other day and when I gave them to Mother, I convinced her that Dave bought them for her and she totally believes me and still does!

Oh, and Sam, I truely think your an awesome guy, a real friend. I just want you to know. I think I come across as cold a lot of the time, so I just need you to know that I think of you as one of my most important, most valued friends. Okay?

Kindest Regards,

A Very Sleepy,

Stripes xy

Me (the Busy Bee)

I gave myself concussion! I'm not telling you how, it's so ridiculous and stupid. I seriously can't help it though!

I'm Mental!

I've given myself high hopes about something I know is going to run dry really quickly, again, because of me. I'm not going to tell you what until it's happened, which is Thursday (yes, the same Thursday that I get my Critical Thinking AS result). Oh bum it... I'll tell you what it is, but I can't be bothered to bore you with the details.

I think I have a date!

Then on Saturday, I'm meeting up with Matthew, but again, I can't be bothered to bore you with the details of 'us' so yeah... sorry. I will tell you one thing though:

It's Complicated.

I'm reading Junk by Melvin Burgess now. I know it's not exactly uplifting (which I was looking for) but the writing style is a pleasant break from the bleak, cynical world of Chuck Palahniuk. I don't particularly like the characters either, so there won't be a huge heartbreak like there was in both Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, and Prey.

I'm A Bookoholic!

Kindest Regards,

Somebody That Cares,

Stripes xy

My Three Part Dream

Dream One:

Me and Jonathan and a group of people stood in a bus stop that we'd never seen before the school cafeteria. Jonathan and I decided that we'd run over to the other bus stop, near a skip. When we were there, it tured out that it had been half converted into a conservatory. Everyone joined us and then we all got on the bus. We then had to go to another bus stop and it was getting really dark. Me and a stranger (who I knew in my dream) ran through the site of a closed down warehouse and then she lifted up a wire-mesh fence for me to crawl under. When I got to the other side, she was gone, and I started to cry because I was lost. Shortly after, I remembered where the bus stop was and I ran to it just in time to catch the bus. Simon Cowell was sat in the back seat for some really weird reason. I was holding a huge teddy bear on my lap and had my tote bag with my phone and iPod and money in, etc. Simon then looked really scared and when we turned around, everything surrounding us was ice. We went to reverse up a hill, but that had turned to ice as well and we started to slide back down. A fire engine came and the firemen made us walk up a hill, before we took off our shoes and socks and slid down the ice on some black plastic that they'd put there for our safety. We then just stood around laughing before I realised that I'd never see my iPod again. That's when I woke up the first time.

Dream Two:

I walked through the gates of my primary school, still upset about the iPod, and then I saw a guy I use to like called William and it was like I was in Year Six again. We were laughing and joking about when I found two books on the floor, so I picked them up to ask who they belonged to. We went inside and sat in the hall, like we use to in primary school, with the television showing a very childish film on the stage. Me and William exchanged a look of nostalgia and then everyone started to leave. I put the books in front of me and some kid put loads of money in my hand and thanked me. The Year Three teacher and the Year Four teacher stayed behind with me and a few other people my age that had stumbled into their primary school. It took them a while to explain that they were his books and that he gave me the money as a reward for finding them. For some reason, I just couldn't understand. Then, the Year Three teacher (who loved me throughout primary school) made me read out a part of the book, but I couldn't, and to make things wose, I couldn' find a page I could read. This upset me since throughout primary, I was always the top of the class. That's when I woke up the second time.

Dream Three:

I was with this amazingly pretty girl who was an adult, but came across as being my age. I don't know, maybe I was older in my dream than I am now. We walked out of the primary school doors before she threw a weird looking camera in my hand. I started taking pictures of these weird, hairy, strong men that were hiding in the kitchen, behind the cafeteria. Then we ran away before they could see, and kill, us. Sprinting, we got to the primary's playground and then this pretty stranger that I was with started shooting at this man with a gun. I quickly took a photo of him before discovering I had a gun, exacatly like the one this girl had, in my other hand. We ran through the corridors, shooting these weird looking men, and then we hid by a car next to the cafeteria. A man came out on crutches and was being helped by two men in suites. I asked the girl if he was 'one of us' and she didn't answer. I had a feeling he was. They led the man past the cafeteria and as the man behind him was nearly hidden by the wall, he shot the girl next to me in the forehead repeatidly and then shot me in the forehead repeatidly. I took a shot at him and missed, but did get a photo of him. I looked at the beautiful stranger that I was with and she looked at me back. We both shared a confussed expression. We saw the bullets, but they had felt like water. I could see no bullet wound on her and neither could she on me. We ran around the cafeteria and I leapt over a wall, taking cover. I called her and she followed my lead. We were both hiding in the graveyard. That's when I woke up the third, and last, time.

Kindest Regards,

A Bewildered,

Stripes xy

The Shifter's Series.

A few months back, I discovered a book called Stray by Rachel Vincent. The cover caught me as it's really interesting and featured a female with four claw marks on her lower back. My curiosity had me hooked to it, so I had to check it out. I'd finished reading the Twilight Saga and then I'd read another Chuck Palahniuk book before moving onto a new book. (I usually do this since I aim to read all of his books.)

I really liked how Stephanie Meyer had created a new kind of werewolf and vampire, very much unlike the ones that feature in a lot of books and films. I liked this new idea of them; vampires trying not to be murderous people and werewolves just being very large wolves that can hear the thoughts of their prides other members. Yes, vampires and werewolves seem to be childish subject matter, but they're not. It all depends on how you depict them, you may be using them as a methaphor.

These books are not childish. They aren't exactly The God Delusion or The Mayor Of Casterbridge, but they aren't Jacqueline Wilson either! They left me thirsty for more books featuring fictional species that weren't so stereotypical that they made me feel sick, and because of that, I was in search of good books with preferably werewolves in.

This book cover suggested that to me, but I was in for a very pleasant surprise and little did I realise at the time that I had just stumbled upon the exact thing I was looking for. Stray, book one of the Shifter's series by Rachel Vincent, is about werecats. I know, I'd never heard of them either, and because of that, my blood pumped and my jaw clenched with excitement.

The series is about Faythe Sanders who's father, Greg Sanders, is the pride's Alpha, their pride being the largest. They are all werecats, but as the series name suggests, they take the form of people and then shift into these huge black panther-like cats. The Alpha is the head of their area (pride) and they have many enforcers. They have many children as a Tabby is the only way that the pride can continue, however tabbies are rare hence them having so many brothers. Whoever Faythe marrys will go on to become the Alpha of the Pride, therefor he has to be a fellow werecat.

There are other cats apart from Pride cats. There are strays, rogues and wildcats, but pride cats are the most influencial and the only ones who have a system complete with politics.

After Stray, there's Rogue, Pride and then Prey. I finished reading Pey the other night and could barely keep the tears in. I cried all night and morning since my all time favourite fictional character ever was brutally murdered. I still can't talk about it without welling up. What can I say? I get emotionally attatched to books like this!

I highly recommend them to any girl who's read Twilight and enjoyed it, and maybe it captures a certain percentage of the Magician's Guild readers. Both Rachel Vincent and Trudi Canavan have a flowwing writing style that can hardly be faultered. Consider Yourself Told!

Kindest Regards,

Stripes xy

Tippity Top Songs :D

I finally did it! I managed to make a playlist of my 20 all time favourite songs in order!

1. Tonight, Tonight by Smashing Pumpkins
2. One Day Robots Will Cry by Cobra Starship
3. Somebody Else's Guy by Jocelyn Brown
4. Disco 2000 by Pulp
5. Silently by Elliot Minor
6. Last Night On Earth by Green Day
7. 27 by Fall Out Boy
8. Every You Every Me by Placebo
9. Home Sweet Home by Motley Crue
10. It's Raining Men by The Weather Girls
11. Better Off As Two by FrankMusik
12. Greatest Day by Take That
13. Demolition Lovers by My Chemical Romance
14. Hot For Teacher by Van Halen
15. Armatage Shanks by Green Day
16. Good Enough by Evanescence
17. Gold by Spandau Ballet
18. Explosive by Bond
19. Mr. Bojangles by Ray Quinn
20. The Lovecats by The Cure

Kindest Regards,

Stripes xy

Quick Update of Nothing

So far, I have seen no proof that my guardian angel is a leprechaun. The only time a respectable adult has taken any interest in my blog, I've written about a used condom. Not cool, actually, it's pretty embarrassing.

I've been watching Desperate Romantics, mainly because Aidan Turner is in it, but I do like the Pre-Raphalites as well! So I am watching it for the art as well. I always wandered how they painted that Ophelia picture. Oof! That reminds me of one of my favourite quotes from some kid two years younger than me in school. He ran up to Carys (who's an amazing artist) and said "Are you that person that paints photographs?" Classic!

I have a walrus load of work to do over the holiday. It sucks! Somebody please remind me why I took Art? There's absolutely no self-expression and I'm completely useless when it comes to faking passion. It takes ages as well...

Stephen Fry (God) is Mottophobic, so now I'm not worried about being a freak because even if it does class me as one, I'm a tad bit like Stephen Fry!

I'm 50 pages away from finishing Hubert Selby Jr's Requiem For a Dream. I like the story, but the writing style is simply awful. Basically, one scene, or mini story, is written in one paragraph, and one paragraph is around 4 pages. That makes it tiresome to read and as I have to finish a paragraph before I put the bookmark in so I don't loose my place, I don't start reading a new paragraph unless I know how long it is.

After I'm done with this book, I'm moving onto Prey by Rachel Vincent, Diary by (my favourite author) Chuck Palahniuk and Moab is My Washpot by Stephen Fry.

Kindest Regards,

A Seriously Bored,

Stripes xy

Thanks a Bunch, Mom

Mother just walked in holding a box from my sister's room. She shook the box at me, signalling that I was suppose to open it, so I laughed and asked if it was scary. I thought that maybe there were dead bugs in there or a huge spider or something. Mother said it wasn't insects or anything, but she sounded like she was going to cry. So I opened it.

Now being a virgin (do I get a cash prize?), I've never really seen anything like this. In the middle of the box was a knotted condom, and when I lifted it up a bit, there was all this gunky stuff in there. It was pretty rank... I'll give you that!

Mother burst out crying saying she was going to put some Winnie The Pooh stuff in there (bless my Mom, she's so sweet) but she didn't see the point now. She asked what it was and I told her, the I asked if she's ever seen one and she shook her head saying that women her age don't usually see used condoms.

The worst part is that I don't know how old it is and I touched something that had not only been on a penis, but inside my sister's vagina... Gross! I think I might just die. Before I die though, I'm going to call Tess and ask her what the hell is wrong with her.

Kindest Regards,

A Grossed Out,

Stripes xy

Boys Boys Boys!

Okay, like on the Sims, I have a Life Goal...

I Aim To Be An Author.

When I say Author, I mean to have a book published. It doesn't have to be a best seller. It doesn't have to be liked. It just has to be published. I'll sit at home and see a published version of something I wrote and that will make me eternally happy. You see, I don't ask for much, it just sounds like a lot!

At the moment, I'm working on a book with a male Irish lead character. The hard part? He's male. Now, this may surprise you, but I'm not. Therefore I doubt my ability to write from a male's perspective and make it convincing.

This is where you guys come in (if you are willing to lend a helping hand). If you could please email me a brief (or detailed if possible) description of your feelings and reactions to certain events, then I shall be ever so grateful.

Don't Worry... These will not be seen by anybody else apart from me and I will not be using them word for word as a part of the book. They will be put into the research part of my huge folder and then I shall try and put myself into the mindset that is present in the email. I don't need names, or examples of when it's happened to you before. It can be completely impersonal. I just need something to draw on when I'm worried my character is speaking with a female's mind.

If you are willing to help me out, the email is:

jupiterstar@hotmail.co.uk

In the subject box, please just put something along the lines of YOUR BOOK or RESEARCH or, if you have a sense of humour, I'M YOUR LAB RAT.

Topics may include whatever you feel is important to be spoken from a males point of view. Examples include: When a girl you like talks to you. When you get nervous. When you feel like you're the odd one out. When you get a *cough cough*... When you have a less than dry dream (why does that happen?)

Any ideas are welcome... I' kind of desperate to be honest!

Kindest Regards,

Stripes xy

Work Experience (in Brief)

MONDAY:

Sorted through the attic of costumes, make-up and wigs. Designed costumes and set for our upcoming play. Did some administrative work.

TUESDAY:

Prepared a presentation about our costume and set design to give that night. Started to collect some cardboard boxes to use for the set. Did some administrative work. Promoted the upcoming show.

WEDNESDAY:

Collected all of the boxes to use for the set. We strengthened the set. We prepared the set. We did some flyering. We bought material to use for the costumes.

THURSDAY:

Preparation for painting the set. Painted the set. Made the ties.

FRIDAY:

Packed away the set for transportation. Finished off the ties. Edited the scripts and did some stage management. Put the clasps on the ties. Collected the props. Packed up.

Just a Quickie...

Okay, so I haven't posted a blog for ages, and I've been on work experience all week and will be tomorrow as well. Basically, I don't really have time to blog right this second! However, hopefully, my next blog will be all about my work experience, so don't worry, all shall be revealed soon! I also have a play on the 23rd and 24th, but the script hasn't been completed yet, so that's kind of stressful and time consuming as well. On top of that Welsh Bac shizzle that I need to do!

Jade McSorley didn't win Britain's Next Top Model, but then again, neither did that Sophie bitch... Mecia won, and she's living in London with Jade now. Both of them pursuing their modelling careers. Jade lost out due to her weight but everyone is ultra-confident that we'll see her again. I have her picture on my mirror next to Ray Quinn and Stephen Fry. She's up there with the stars!

Kindest Regards,

An Uber Speedy,

Stripes xy

Don't Cry

Okay, maybe I get to attached to people on the television, but it's not my fault. On Britain's Next Top Model, Jade (who I am pretty much in love with) won a challenge and the prize was a couture dress. She was trying one on, and was all excited (it was seriously sweet) and she looked over to the other girls because she was so proud of herself but they just glared back. In the speaking parts they do, she was nearly crying saying that she was so proud of herself but when she saw the other girls, it was upsetting to realise how they don't want you to be in that position. It was really sad since she was practically crying. Why can't people be happy for others, even if it is a competition? Anyway, it really upset me.

On a more uplifting note, I bought La Roux's album today on Amazon. I'm excited as my favourite band (Cobra Starship) are releasing their album this month. Elliot Minor's will be soon as well. I'm still loving Green Day's new album, I was not disappointed. Plus the 4th book in the werecat series by Rachel Vincent came out today, I shall be receiving that soon as I pre-ordered it with last weeks pocket money. I didn't realise I spent my pocket money before I received it this much! It's okay though. I have £75 in my purse and £60 in the bank. I also have some money boxes, so I'm not turning into a spendaholic!

Oh and before I go, I've gone back to writing. Padraig O'Doherty (the Irish main character) and Matthew Shepherd (the hot American friend) were very happy to see my return. I need to change their names, as when I googled them, Padraig O'Doherty turned out to be some random guy on FaceBook, and Matthew Shepherd was a gay 21-year-old student in America who was tortured and murdered by two guys who acted gay to win his trust, although his surname is spelt without the H after the P. This is actually a tad bit like the character I had written. Plus I think I'm developing a thing for Ed Byrne, an Irish comedian. Yes I know, it's totally the Irish thing again! Oh well... as long as my guardian angel is a leprechaun I'm happy!

Kindest Regards,

A Boiling Hot,

Stripes xy

There's a Cat There...

Okay, so I was going through all my MySpace comments with the word cat in the highlighter tool. Manny told me this awesome poem before about an ickle cat, but I forgot the name of it. Anyway, whilst going through all ten pages of comments (I have 456 comments), some words came up that had the word cat in, and I found it amusing. Here's the list:

• werecat (+ cat, cats)
• education (+ educational)
• qualification
• caricaturist
• catharsis
• catch (+ catcher, catching)
• complicated
• certificate
• vacation
• catholic
• catalan

I think that my favourite has to be Catholic, although complicated is pretty dandy too. Most of the comments containing these words were old comments from Manny (before he knew of my cat 'thing'). Then again, Batpawn is one letter away from Catpawn which makes you think of Cat Porn! (laughs) Anyway, if anyone who reads this could please recommend any poems, paintings, pictures or anything that has a cat in or as the subject matter, please? That would be Puuuurfect!

My family are amazingly excited! You know my darling Santi? That's right... the result of the pedigree Norwegian Forest next door when she escaped and got up the duff by some stray. It's funny, Santi looks like more of a pedigree than his Mom yet he's only half... Anywho, Whiskas are doing a competition to find the next Cover Model for their cat food, and everyone has to admit, Santi is a babe. Hell... that's why I maried him!

Kindest Regards!

xy

My Bedside Visit

Okay, so since my operation, I've been amazingly depressed. My face is huge, the swelling has gone from the left side of my jaw to my neck. The bruising has really come out today, making the swollen area bright luminous yellow. I can only really eat soup and custard, and I only really like the latter. I can't look at myself in the mirror or I feel like one of those American guys that eat so many hamburgers they end up with a cushion of fat around their heads. Yeah, that's me now.

I had to wake Mother up at 4am this morning. I didn't want to, but I couldn't think of anything else to do. It's weird, I didn't expect her to help or know what to do, and I ended up walking (as best as I could) back to my room, but the thought of somebody knowing and seeing my pain is a lot better than just suffering in my room alone.

Let me explain; I have to take 2 paracetamols four times a day maximum (so 8 in 24 hours), and 1 ibuprofen three times a day (I think you can do the math on that one). They don't really do much to help the pain of my ever-expanding face and stitches, but I use to take co-codamol for my period pains (caused by Endometriosis). Mother and I decided I should take one of them before I went to bed. It was 3.30am (we'd just finished watching Wanted) and the strength was 500mg.

So let me explain the pain that reared its head at 4am...

My ribs felt like they had bruises on top of bruises on top of bruises. I couldn't breath. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. Then the pain moved to my insides. My organs felt as if they had all been coated in a layer of excruciating pain. They felt as if they were swollen and being squeezed at the same time, then being punched, kicked and just generally tortured.

I have never ever been as worried about having an over-dose in my whole entire life.

I can't be bothered to tell the story of how I couldn't walk, how my Dad moaned that he had work in the morning, how Mother had to phone the 24/7 medical line and then wait for a call back, then phone again, then wait for another phone call that never came, then ponder whether or not to phone the ambulance, then phone the 24/7 medical line again, then find out somebody is coming to the house.

It was 6.30am when she arrived and the pain had pretty much calmed down. She was nice, and thorough. She said that she thinks I had a bad reaction to the codeine due to not having much food in my stomach (because I can barely eat). She said that I should try to be active because the pain killers are sort of sedating me and my organs may fall asleep. She said we should try slim fast as people use them instead of meals and therefore will fill me up more.

Kindest Regards,

A Stupidly Swollen,

Stripes xy

PostScript: After seeing my face like this, I've decided that I'm never going to complain about having stupidly fat cheeks, or jowls, ever again.